A Life Well Lived

About 3 weeks ago, I finished N.D. Wilson's new book Death by Living.

Ouch: "The truth is that a life well lived is always lived on a rising scale of difficulty."

You mean life doesn't just get easier for those who are Christ's people, by virtue of the fact that we are His? You mean the Lord doesn't always make life easy for us because He loves us? You mean it's going to get harder than this?

I was struck by so much of what Wilson says in his book, and obviously a lot of it was read through the lens of the "Cranford Family, Years 2012-2013."

Here's another one:
    "Why do we die? Because we lived. You cannot stop yourself from aging, which is to say that you cannot sub out of this extremely rough, full-contact (no pads) game. You cannot throw a diva fit backstage in this production and force the understudy to take your place. You are in every scene. You are on the field for every play. And you go into the next one and the next one carrying the baggage and the wounds and the weariness of the last one and the last one and the last one."

I'm confident I'm not the only one who has, at one time or another, desperately wished that someone else could live a certain experience for me--could take the script from my hands and sub in for me, just for a scene. But Christ has not called us to that, and that is a difficult reality to accept. This is my life, and I have to live every second of it. I am accountable for the way I live it, even (and especially) the difficult seconds. Every last miserable, terrifying, painful, traumatic second.

In these last 32 weeks, God has stretched us, challenged us, and entrusted our family with a lot of unknowns about this little one that is due to arrive on November 9th. We are still left in the unknown (aren't we always?) but there seems to be a light at the end of this tunnel, and it appears to be getting brighter. I have begun NST's twice weekly, and we have *Lord willing* only one more appointment at MFM. Baby C is in the 70th percentile for weight, and all indications of pre-term labor seem to have diminished. We continue to ask for your prayers as neither of us feel like we can really breathe sighs of relief until we get the privilege of holding this little blessing in our arms. In these last few weeks, I vacillate from panic to excitement and back again. Our prayers are much the same as they were two or three weeks ago, give or take a few:

• That the baby would grow safely to term in Anna’s womb;
• That the Lord would strengthen us against worry;
• That the baby would continue to move frequently (words cannot express the peace we feel when this little one wiggles around);
• That the Lord would care for Anna during her appointments through:
• Allowing the doctors to find a heartbeat quickly (we discovered we had lost Thomas during a Doppler scan, so these are never easy); 
• That the Lord would prepare our hearts to be parents to another child

In our "meanwhile," Eli has started a two day preschool/Mother's Morning Out program, I am teaching one day a week at Greyfriars, and we are slowly... and I mean slowly... extracting baby items from closets, the attic, the garage, etc. Life is busy, but God has been good to us. Thank you, friends, for your continued prayers on our behalf!

An update!

Weeks ago, Michael sent out an update to our church family after appointments at both the regular OB and the specialists at Maternal Fetal Medicine. Instead of trying to improve his update, I'll post it here. Nothing has changed since the email was sent out, except that baby is two weeks bigger than he/she was then--we'll take it!

 We truly do have much to be thankful for, and as our little one's arrival gets closer and closer, we are getting excited to find out whether Eli will have a brother or a sister, and to welcome this little one in our family with gratitude and joy.

Hello Everyone,

 

Thank you all so much for your ongoing prayers and support for Anna and our baby.  Please allow me to take a moment to update you on where we stand today…

 

God, in His mercy, has seen fit to see us through several weeks of uncertainty.  Anna is now 28 (now I am 30) weeks pregnant and both she and the baby are doing great.  The medication that Anna has been on for the past month and a half seems to be working magnificently, and with each passing day the light at the end of the tunnel gets a little bit brighter.  We had the unanticipated opportunity to go to the beach last week.  After receiving conflicting recommendations from several different doctors, we finally received the green light provided that Anna took it easy and that we knew the location of the closest hospital should something happen.

 

We went to both of Anna’s doctors this past Monday- regular and high risk OBs.  We received much encouraging news that day, and two pieces of information stick out in our minds.  First, Anna was told that she does not have gestational diabetes.  After failing her first glucose test, we were both thinking, “figures!”  But the Lord was merciful, and we now have one less thing to worry about.  The second piece of encouraging news came from our least favorite physician at Maternal Fetal Medicine (high-risk OB ).  Upon walking in the door, he sat down and said, “28 weeks…if your baby is born now it has a 99% chance of survival.”  While we want this little one to “bake in the oven” as long as possible, this statistic- after so many that were negative- was music to our ears.

 

We still have a little while to go, so we ask that you all continue to keep us in your prayers.  Specifically, these are the requests that are dearest to our hearts:

 

• That the baby would grow safely to term in Anna’s womb;
• That the Lord would strengthen us against worry;
• That the baby would continue to move frequently (words cannot express the peace we feel when this little one wiggles around);
• That we would be able to go to the doctor as infrequently as possible (Maternal Fetal Medicine is not a fun place to be);
• That the Lord would care for Anna during her appointments through:
  • Allowing the doctors to find a heartbeat quickly (we discovered we had lost Thomas during a Doppler scan, so these are never easy);
  • Allowing the ultrasounds at MFM to yield positive news of the baby’s development (this baby has been measured from head to toe far too many timesJ)
• That the Lord would prepare our hearts to be parents to another child